Episode 4: Marriage and Community
Considerations for the Marriage Episodes
1. Couples are generally reticent to disclose or share personal details about the joys and struggles of their relationship unless they are in a community group that has some history and trust with each other. If your group is a newer group, use examples from your own marriage and ask them questions about other marriages that they know and admire. As a leader, be prepared to share your own responses to at least one of the questions in each episode. That will give the other members of the group a clearer understanding of how they might share their own experience.
2. If you have singles in your group, be sensitive to their perspective and broaden the questions to include relationships in general.
3. The quotes provided in this discussion guide can also be a good starting point for discussion if the members of the group are reluctant to share personal details. Refer to them throughout the discussion and use them to provide perspective on the conversation within your group.
4. Choosing to be vulnerable requires honesty, courage and reflection. Be sensitive to the reality that different members of the group will share and be vulnerable at different levels.
5. Being vulnerable in a community can be a powerful and moving experience, especially about marriage. The questions and discussion may trigger powerful memories, some they may have been forgotten for some time. Be sensitive to know when to stop and pray, when to allow the other members of the group to affirm and encourage someone after they have shared.
Join the Conversation
Record thoughts and questions here that come up as you watch the episode. Explore them later with the group.
Discuss the Episode
1. Dan mentions that marriage reveals the heart of God. Pleasure is His invention and He created us to enjoy intimate, sensual, and mutual relationship. Have you ever thought of God or your marriage in those ways? What gets in the way of thinking that way?
2. Dan and Tremper imply marriages benefit from strong communities and strong communities benefit from good marriages. Can you describe examples of where you’ve seen this to be true? Do you have a place where you can be real and vulnerable, able to tell the truth about your life, and allow others to speak into your life?
Reflect on What Others Have to Say
Underline and mark ideas you would like to discuss.
Dearly beloved: We have come together in the presence of God to witness and bless the joining together of this man and this woman in Holy Matrimony. The bond and covenant of marriage was established by God in creation, and our Lord Jesus Christ adorned this manner of life by his presence and first miracle at a wedding in Cana of Galilee. It signifies to us the mystery of the union between Christ and his Church, and Holy Scripture commends it to be honored among all people.
The union of husband and wife in heart, body, and mind is intended by God for their mutual joy; for the help and comfort given one another in prosperity and adversity; and, when it is God’s will, for the procreation of children and their nurture in the knowledge and love of the Lord. Therefore marriage is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, deliberately, and in accordance with the purposes for which it was instituted by God.
The Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage, Book of Common Prayer
Will all of you witnessing these promises do all in your power to uphold these two persons in their marriage?
People We will.
The Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage, Book of Common Prayer
Join the Conversation
Record thoughts and questions here that come up as you watch the episode. Explore them later with the group.
Discuss the Episode
1. Dan mentions that marriage reveals the heart of God. Pleasure is His invention and He created us to enjoy intimate, sensual, and mutual relationship. Have you ever thought of God or your marriage in those ways? What gets in the way of thinking that way?
2. Dan and Tremper imply marriages benefit from strong communities and strong communities benefit from good marriages. Can you describe examples of where you’ve seen this to be true? Do you have a place where you can be real and vulnerable, able to tell the truth about your life, and allow others to speak into your life?
Reflect on What Others Have to Say
Underline and mark ideas you would like to discuss.
Dearly beloved: We have come together in the presence of God to witness and bless the joining together of this man and this woman in Holy Matrimony. The bond and covenant of marriage was established by God in creation, and our Lord Jesus Christ adorned this manner of life by his presence and first miracle at a wedding in Cana of Galilee. It signifies to us the mystery of the union between Christ and his Church, and Holy Scripture commends it to be honored among all people.
The union of husband and wife in heart, body, and mind is intended by God for their mutual joy; for the help and comfort given one another in prosperity and adversity; and, when it is God’s will, for the procreation of children and their nurture in the knowledge and love of the Lord. Therefore marriage is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, deliberately, and in accordance with the purposes for which it was instituted by God.
The Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage, Book of Common Prayer
Will all of you witnessing these promises do all in your power to uphold these two persons in their marriage?
People We will.
The Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage, Book of Common Prayer
